Matchmaking by a Ghost
by StarburstPhoenix
Summary: Celia is sick of seeing two idiots acting like lovesick puppies. So she decided, why not be the cupid? Hilarious results assures the whole crew that even drags the Marines and the Yonko along! First chapter a bit rushed review if you want the story to continue. Yaoi included don't like don't read. Marco x Ace. Humor included. Romance starts at chapter 2.
1. The matchmaking ghost

In an all too familiar ship had the pyro sitting there like an emo guy. Well he _is_ an emo guy so.

No comments.

I stared, this was getting ridiculous. at first seeing Ace all hyped up on murdering the daylights out of the world's strongest man Shirohige was quite entertaining and very hilarious (and worrying, he did not eat shit) but now? It was getting very irritating.

Even the commanders in the huge ship ignored him with the exception of a few which were assigned by the old man to do missions with regards to Ace aka the childish man. I only knew of that because I can pass through walls and go back beside Ace without anyone seeing me or noticing me but at that time I could recall Shirohige and several commanders sensing something despite the fact that not even the all famous Haki could sense her. That alone had Celia thinking that these commanders were not assigned to be just brute fighters. They were experienced and even she would have a hard time fighting against them. that was saying a lot considering that she had lived for more than a thousand years.

Though I seem to be forgetting something...hmm what was it again...?

Oh yes! Introductions! Haha sorry!

I'm Celia aka the Ghost that lingers around Hiken Ace according to the newspapers these days.

Aka the Ghost which Ace had freaked out when he first saw me.

Aka the lady which no one could see except for the idiotic pyro.

Aka the Former Joker of the crew of Hiken Ace

And finally aka the same ghost which lived for a thousand years and is now staring at the stupid boy sulking in the dark shadows of the huge and bright ship. Wow.

What's my situation currently? Well...

...basically the ghost could not leave Ace's side by more than 15 meters. That sucked cause she had to be the babysitter of the _dimple brat._

And now said brat was burying his face to his lap, only his squid-ink hair could be seen popping out like a jungle.

I stared again. And sighed again. He bluntly ignored me again. I felt my nerves snapped in an instant as I floated to him and _kicked him on the head_.

"OWWW! Celia you bastard!" He clutched his head, groaning in pain. What was seen by others is that the crazy boy was shouting at thin air (as usual) but that was not what the pyro saw.

Though what the Commanders think about it was a different story. They knew that I existed, only they couldn't see how I look like. I'll have to appall them for their sharp instincts.

Ahem back to the subject before I blurt out stuff.

Ace the fool glared at me so hard I could fry an egg in those eyes. he had those...childish tears in his eyes that I couldn't help but roar in laughter as I clutched my stomach in pain (yes [ain was felt ), floating around in air like what humans does when they can't help but roll on the floor. I vaguely saw on the corner of my eyes Marco looked critically (he was waiting for a chance to speak to Ace about the issue of joining the crew) as well as several commanders observing the...unique behavior of the brat I'm laughing at. Wait that rhymes!

"Stop laughing! And what did you do that for?!" He bellowed in childish anger (To me it was childish).

I crossed my pale arms, "To stop your foolish acts that's what" I bluntly told him off.

"I'm not childish!"

"That's not what I see in my eyes"

He paused. I sighed once again.

"You know...you look like an idiot to the entire crew now"

He growled at me, a sign of him attempting to protect his pride but failing miserably.

Tense silence prevailed between the both of us, unnoticed to the others. They were probably thinking about how mad Ace was.

I huffed.

"Look I know that you're not a fool, you can't defeat Shirohige. And escaping the ship with your entire crew is impossible," He was about to retort but I didn't spare him the time for that. "And even if you do somehow accomplish what your 'supposedly want to do' thing I don't think there's any merit from killing Shirohige" After a long session of thinking he calmed down, sitting down in a different position once again. Which didn't go unnoticed by any of the watching people (aka the commanders)

Ace pursed his lips, knowing what's the next thing I was going to say and let out his goddamnpuppyeyesthatnearlykilledmeonce.

I could feel my hair roots softening and threatening to fall.

"Don't worry just join the goddamn crew, no one's gonna leave in the end" I reassured him, deeply I knew that it was because of me that's stopping him from joining this cheerful, joyful, amiable crew that cherishes their Nakama.

I silently counted in three, two, one, Marco comes in!

As expected of the first commander he took this chance into convincing him into joining the crew. And succeeding of course!

I patted Marco on the back, silently noting him flinched.

"Thank you" I whispered. And as he turned around I made my presence even dimmer. Like a shadow.

The next day I witnessed something unusual, Marco seems to be able to see me. If him staring at me all day didn't indicate it then I don't know what was. I zoned my eyes on him.

But how did he see me? Only people who I contracted with could see me...unless...I pounced at him with mischief in my eyes. He flinched in surprise and stepped back. The other crewmates upon seeing the particular action made by their one and only Commander laughed and guffawed (Can't touch me! lol). Needless to say the pineapple was walking towards me and Ace with bruised faced men behind him apologizing.

"Ace who's that beside you?" he asked in slight hesitation, pointing at me like an engima.

"Huh you can see the witch?" Ace blurted out, I smacked him at the back of his head.

"I'm not surprised how stupid you look now Brat" The brat thing kinda became a nickname for the idiot.

"I'm not a brat!"

"Yes you are now shush" He stopped ranting, instead he pouted.

"I'm Celia the ghost nice to meet you!" I said to the pineapple commander. he nodded at me apprehensively.

"Don't worry I'm harmless if you're not part of the marines" I waved him off before floating high up in the air to twirl for a while, Ace and Marco talking animatedly to each other. Love sick fools.

I should be the cupid next time! Yes that will do!

"Now my chappies look forward to the next chapter!"

"What are you talking about?" Ace looked at me confused while Marco suddenly had a cold breeze running through his skin. He had a bad feeling about this.

 **Haha and its doneeeeee! Okayyyy sorry for well...you know...not actively writing my stories but I don't really do well without reviews so pls reviewww as usualllll Thanks!**

 **Next time: The matchmaking begins! Secret of Celia is revealed! Yaoi included don't like back out this instant.**


	2. Bitch in heat

You know when two flames go together they danced around, creating even larger flames. The sight of it sent euphoria even to people with no sense of any artistic skills. Better if said flames were of two different colors. And the best when said flames are scaring the shit out of the marines.

Yea I hate them. Don't get me wrong I am most certainly not a ghost fueled solely on grudges and creepy stuff like that. Nope.

However as I said I am a ghost that lingers around Ace. Like 24/7.

So you could guess that I was with him as well when Sabo was killed by the Tenryubito. Which wasn't a good sight. And the marines were technically at fault, seeing as how they even supported the fatass and the sluts.

SO YEA I DO HATE THEM. PERIOD.

.

.

.

Well not like ghosts could have blood spewing out of their vaginas but...meh.

"CELIA WHAT THE FUCK MAN?" Ace screamed like a bitch in heat- I mean like a warrior.

"What is your problem bro?"

"Your the problem! Don't say such vulgar shit man!"

I was confused. What vulgar shit?

...oh...

"Oops sorry, did I say that out?"

"FUCK YEA DUDE!"

Whoa Ace...chill man. Looks like the matchmaking have to start now before the she-male gets his/her(?) fur ruffled up. Well the only problem was whether Marco has a huge dick or not. More elegantly 'penis' or 'stick'.

Not being stereotype bros but I could already imagine Ace moaning for Marco's huge fat dick.

...

I hereby apologize for the vulgarities. However this fanfiction is rated M so...yes.

Suddenly orange filled my eyes, the stream of hot flames crashed into yet another pitiful Marine ship. Man I felt remorse for them.

Situation? The Whitebeard Pirates are currently dealing with NEWbies wearing marine uniform in the NEW world. Lol get it guys? Never mind. Apparently they didn't know that it wasn't necessary to engage with every single pirate ship on sight. Which led to this.

"ORIAAAAA!" Ace screamed out a random thing, slamming his fire fist onto another soldier, releasing his pent-up stress of not having sexual intercourse- I MEAN NOT BEING ABLE TO ROAM FREELY.

Gosh was Ace's mind filthy **(A/N: No its just you XD)**

Sighing I picked up a crushed watermelon and begun eating as screams and cries of help enters my ears. Gosh shut up.

Was what I would want to shout at them but seeing as they are chased by a WALKING DIAMOND, a GAY WITH A KIMONO, a SON OF A FUCKING SHARK (LITERALLY), a PYRO MANIAC and the worst thing of all. THE MOTHERBIRD. LOL GET IT? MOTHERBIRD? You know? Like MOTHERSHIP TROLLLLLLL.

AHEM! I mean and get chased by a large, blue, amazing, glorious, spectacular. amazing, fun-filled, spectacular, glorious, amazing phoenix with a long tail. Well long TAILS. You get my point. And a fat beak. Wait a minute...

(Does the beak represents how large the sexual organ is?)

.

.

.

.

.

Holy shiiiiiiiiii-

"WE WON!"

Cries of victory and pride echoed through the one-sided battlefield. Like dragons vs rats. Fat rats.

I slammed my head on the deck of the Moby Dick. STOP! Like NO! NOOOOO!

After 10 minutes of getting my stupid, perverted thoughts out of my head I nudged Marco, planning to congratulate him for the size of his- I MEAN, for destroying the marines. But as I nudge him, he did not react one bit.

.HECK? (Trying to restrain on vulgarities in case you didn't know)

I stared blankly on the pineapple. Seriously man? I jumped in front of him in a headbutt motion. He didn't even FLINCH!

Soooooo...he..you know...can't see me?

So is my special magic attack of 'I-can-make-marco-see-me-by-some-strange-shit-method' is temporary?

...well at least I won't be blamed by the upcoming matchmaking service that I'll be doing for the sanity of all of the perverts reading my fanfiction. Not like any of them knows...maybe?

SO YEA.

I didn't really device a plan yet soooo...see you next chapter?

BYEEEEEEE~~~

 **Okay so leave a review on how and what methods you want to get Ace and Marco togetherrrr~~~**

 **(And yes I lied)**

 **Please don't kill me.**


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